At what point in your life do you figure out that you yourself are your number one priority in life? Is there a set age that we tend to figure it out, or is it something that takes years to establish? There isn't a clear answer to that, at least I don't think Too often do we see people running around looking for answers as to what they are supposed to be doing with their lives, who they are supposed to associate themselves with, what is considered a healthy amount of friends and acquaintances, and who we are supposed to wind up with according to the opinion of society. You are supposed to go to school. You are supposed to have a good job. You are supposed to be successful. You are supposed to be happy, in conjunction with the above. Are you, though? I think a lot of people have the tendency to compare themselves to the people they graduated with. It's a good base, they're the kids you grew up with, the ones you had your 'firsts' with, the ones you made some of the best memories with. Take for instance my grad class. I'm 24 years old, so I graduated in 2009 from a Christian-based private school. High standards. I've already got fellow high-school classmates that are married, have kids, bought their first house, graduated university and have successful jobs (some even moved on to attend medical school, congrats). Meanwhile I'm over here still feeling like I'm trying to figure out a few things. I know where I want to wind up, that's not a question I am faced with. But the things that make me feel accomplished are doing the laundry or like nailing a new recipe or hitting the books for 6 hours straight. So why am I still comparing myself to those who have their lives together? Because they look happy. My new years resolution this year was to be happy. What that entailed at the time I'm not so sure; rather I have figured out a few things that already make me 10x happier than I was last year:
When I started my blog, I wanted it to be my safe place that I would have no limitations to what I wrote. I still feel that way, but in the six months of me running this database I have learned that it is a way for me to open up to the world. Society still terrifies me in some ways, but I think this is a pretty good step to learn how to be myself.
Food for thought for those who are reading, I want you to take this with you for the rest of the day:
<3
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It’s a chilly October morning, and as I sit on my bed bundled up like a caterpillar in a blanket cocoon with a face mask on, I’m grinding down the basics on what it takes to set goals and what it feels like to be motivated. No… I didn’t get inspired smothering a masque on my face. I got inspired when I felt sweat dripping down my forehead in the gym this morning and let me tell you… that sweat fogged up my glasses. About that life, hey? Don’t worry, it was a great workout. It isn’t uncommon to fall in and out of a goal-setting mindset. In fact, it’s more common to come across people who have a lot of trouble setting goals and sticking to them just as much as they have a hard time finding any form of motivation.
I think a lot of people who lack motivation to set goals tend to turn to people involved in active lifestyles for advice, like we are advice-giving gurus or something. True, I definitely would not be where I am today without having set some goals to get me here. It took many years, and a lot of mental determination. That said however, us ‘advice guru’ folk also have our downfalls. We go through real struggs, let me tell you. I don’t want to get up today. I need more rest. I’m too lazy to cook. I don’t want to go to class. I wish someone could pick up my kids for me. I wish someone could go to this function for me. I just don’t want to handle society today. Any of these sound familiar? These are every day first-world problems, folks. We all have to learn how to deal with them, it’s a part of being an adult. As adults, we will literally dig in our sack of excuses to find a way to get out of daily activities that we have sitting on our plate, and we are all guilty of it. My little epiphany that I had this morning while sweat was dripping in my eye was that I wanted to share my personal tips on how to set goals and keep your motivation level high when times are a little sad so to speak. A couple key factors that hold many individuals back might involve the following:
Cue seasonal depression. I remember this time last year I was going through a really weird time in my life. I was in my fourth year of uni in my sociology degree, when I realized how unhappy school was making me. It made me miserable to think that I was pushing myself through a degree that I absolutely despised all of my professors because of their poor attitude towards students, and ultimately made me hate school. Yeah, hate is a strong word. But I had little motivation to even go to class to the point where I found it really difficult to motivate myself to study. In my last two years in university, the amount of times that a professor said ‘good luck finding a job after this’ really disappointed me. What am I supposed to do now? It’s an awful, yucky funk that a lot of students will find themselves experiencing towards the end of their university career. When I was in that weird place in my life, I started to write down my thoughts on paper. Reading back on it now, I was able to pin-point that a lot of my depression and lack of motivation revolved around school, and where I found happiness was when I was training and doing meal prep. Hold your horses, I’m not saying everyone needs to drop their socks and get on the same train as I was. There’s a science to it. What was I doing when I was in the gym? I was setting little goals. Okay, by the end of this month, I want to see if my waist can come in a little more and widen my lats. So I did. I was so focused on the end result of my goals that it became such a routine to take some time once I had reached whatever goal I had attained to revisit all of my wants and needs in life and break them down by priority. Okay, so pay period rolls around. You have enough money to pay off your credit card bill and then some, or you can go to the mall and buy yourself the pair of sneaks you’ve had your eye on for a while.
Left. Let me talk a bit about how a healthy mindset works. Before you go to sleep every night, think about a few things that went on in your day that were positive. Chances of you waking up in a better mood are far more likely than if you went to sleep thinking damn, that was a horrible day, and risk waking up feeling like a sack of potatoes. I always like to reflect on some of the positives that I experienced before I went to sleep. Yeah, maybe I had a really horrible day. Maybe I had to wake up, slam a coffee, throw on some Dre and handle it, but maybe in amongst that day I found a bit of goodness:
Keeping this good mood going is another challenge. The key: Don’t let the little triggers such as jealousy, anger, annoyance or irritability set you off and light your fuse, rather brush them off and push forward. Seek a level of greatness in your day that will motivate you enough to seek the same level tomorrow and the next day. Seek peace of mind. When we seek greatness, or little things that have potential to set us up for success, we are automatically driven. We are driven to succeed. Driven to have goals. Ask yourself this: Do you have the willpower to hold yourself accountable to succeed? What baby steps do you need to take in your life to help you achieve your goal? What is the measure to your success? Some of the things I have talked about already in regards to goals are weighted by little things. Do you have ability to succeed? Yes. Every single person on this planet is able. Key point here: stop telling yourself that you can’t. Tell yourself that you will. All in all, the point I am trying to get across to you all is that making goals isn’t rocket science, rather they’re little tiny lights at the end of millions of tunnels in our lives that will help us achieve what we truly desire in life. You are all able. You’re all freaking awesome. <3 As we come to the bittersweet end of summer, the sun drifts away form the earth and we suddenly become these frigid human beings that just want to sit in bed, drink tea and eat pie, even though it's still +15 outside. Any excuse to wear Ugg boots though, let's be honest. So I've got a little bit of an addiction to granola. Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I go hard over that sweet, nutty gob of goodness that does everything from make me feel better when I'm being an overly emotional girl to giving me fuel after leg day, or enough fuel to allow me to run 10k and still manage to smile. It's the cheese to my macaroni. It's love. Leaving class today I had a hankering for granola and almond milk from Glow Juicery here in Kelowna, but decided it would be best for me to utilize my own ingredients at home even though they have the BEST almond milk in the universe. Using the brain cells I have been so blessed to be given, I opened my cupboard and pulled out my favourite baking ingredients and came up with some combination that somehow turned into heaven. What you see above are some of my favourite ingredients to use when I'm making my own homemade treats. Creating items that provide on-the-go individuals with fuel that lasts is something I always keep in mind when I choose my ingredients for times like this. This granola that I made is gluten-free and vegan and contains coconut sugar and nectar instead of yucky table sugar. Above we have raw cacao nibs, gluten-free oats, almonds, raw cashews, goji berries and shredded coconut. I like incorporating raw ingredients into my food because it is at its most vulnerable state and filled with nutrients. So with all of that said, let's get to it! Toasted Coco-Nana GranolaWhat you will need:
What you need to do:
What are your favourite flavours of granola? Already thinking of my next batch! <3 Welcome to back to school season, everyone! Hope you are all as jazzed as I am about learning (I'm REAL excited). For you it's probably more beneficial, as I will be learning about nutrition which means more recipes which also means more smiles. Being that this will be my 7th year of post-secondary education (WOW I am old), I know all about that convenient life. Fast Food Fattie. It's easy! You manage to find $5 kicking around and next thing you know you're in the lineup at starbucks getting a grande extra whip pumpkin spice latte with skim milk. If that's not a conflicting sentence, I don't know what is. I really don't like PSL's anyway. After learning a few things (already, I know) about the importance of a balance diet, it made me realize that the meal prep that I was rocking before really ain't all that bad. Being that I have also started a cleanse, I know that nailing my meal prep every time needs to be a thing. For those of you who are just starting college, and you've got your hands on a girthy student loan that allows you to justify spending a few extra bucks on all of the toppings at Menchie's, maybe think twice about what you're putting into your system first. And by that, I mean freshman fifteen. Oh, girl, it's for real. I think when I graduated high school I must have put on a solid 15-20 lbs. I was only taking one course at the college when I first started, but I was working at a day spa that had a hefty cafe/bistro right across the way. So I would sit at my desk every day literally staring at this cafe just dreaming of that cheesy, toasty breakfast bagel loaded with eggs, bacon, mustard, mayo and tomatoes, with a side wonton soup and a fresh doughnut. I think I ate that at least three days a week. But the thing was that it was convenient, and certainly close. So how do you make meals that are delicious AND convenient? All you gotta do it hit up the right areas of a grocery store, find a few hours once or twice a week, a decent playlist and have at 'er. LET ME TELL YOU A LITTLE ABOUT WHAT I EAT. Ok?Mouth. Watering. I haven't always been this way. Before I started getting into the gym, I used to be the girl with a grande caramel macchiato with extra caramel drizzle, plus a breakfast sandwich, plus a lemon poppyseed loaf plus a yogurt parfait... For breakfast. So... fat and carbs and a teensy bit of protein from the eggs and yogurt. Embarrassing. Our bodies need protein in order to repair the muscles we work, and yes although carbs are by far the most important macronutrient that exists in our diets, the carbs consumed from that buttery lemon poppyseed loaf and extra caramel drizzle is no where near the same as the carbs I could have gotten from some blueberries in a protein shake, or better yet, oatmeal. Another mistake I was making back in the day is eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, and not being smart about it either. My typical diet was mostly carbs and fats with very little protein, resulting in quick weight gain from not being very active, and feeling so tired to the point where falling asleep in class was becoming regular thing. Small changes like buying your own groceries and doing your own meal portioning is one of the best things one can do when it comes to eating right with a busy schedule. What I have done with my meal prep is that I have taken the foods that I like and worked them into a well balanced diet that fits the needs of my lifestyle, so what is pictured above gives you a general idea. The basics:
What is this, a healthy Mr. Big or somethin'?!Ah yes. We have all been there. The natural foods (treats) section in Superstore. The candy aisle in Nature's Fare. The fat-free frozen yogurt from Menchie's (with all the toppings?!) Looking up 'healthy treats' on Pinterest, and justifying them as no big deal in your diet. And trying the batter. The thing is, these are all pretty well the same as buying the same un-natural version form Walmart, they're really no better in all honesty. Instead of buying that 'organic, gluten-free, no sugar added, milk chocolate covered caramel peanut butter malt bar' from the health foods store, I highly recommend trying to make one of my healthy Coconut Bliss Bites for that quick sweet fix. Things to avoid sacking on, of course, is anything containing a high amount of refined sugars. You might find yourself reading a label of a chocolate bar and thinking oh but this one has less fat! Did you read the sugar content?! The amount of sugar in dark chocolate is about 1/3 of the amount that would be kicking around in milk chocolate. Yes, the fat content is higher in dark chocolate, but the refined sugar in milk chocolate can lead to a fatty liver, causing weight gain. And as if you're going to stop at 4 squares of milk chocolate, that stuff is a downward spiral. When you have a piece of really good, high potency dark chocolate, chances are you'll have one to two squares and you're good. Science. Concluding notes, staying on track while in school is so freaking hard. I get it. These are just some simple tools you can utilize towards maintaining that healthy beach bod you worked so hard for all summer, and help you stay focused.
A+ meal prep = A+ lab report, right? <3 Prologue If you want to see how mentally strained you can get in a matter of weeks through intense training and a strict diet, throw yourself into show prep. You'll see what I mean. There is no possible way that anyone can walk around and say that they have mastered their diet. No way. That would be like someone saying they have mastered their brain, their willpower, their struggles, their strength. These are all things that we cannot win at. We can't beat ourselves; we as individuals are only able to compete against the person who stares directly back at you in the mirror. It's the toughest competition that one can possibly face. Everyone has their own struggles when it comes to prep, whether they struggle most with their diet (I would say most), their training the ups and downs being an emotional wreck, or perhaps all of the above. From what I have learned in the three preps that I have done, they've all been different. My first show that I did back in November of last year, I was completely focused on the end goal - being on stage for the first time and feeling like I brought my best. I didn't struggle with my diet one bit with that prep, but I sure as heck did struggle with my training. It was hard for me to lift even the slightest things at the end, and the idea walking up the stairs to my bed at the end of the night was less than appealing. But I was mentally strong, having a blast, and loved every second of it. When I went into my prep for BCs, the entire time I felt like I needed to be better. Better than I was at Sandra Wickham. Better than I was physically, mentally and emotionally. But truthfully, BCs completely broke me... I struggled more than I could ever imagine to try and knock the weight off by training harder than I've ever trained in my life, and to know how unhealthy it is to sit on the counter with a jar of peanut butter indulging in spoon after spoon of that little bear spread. I was a hot mess, let's just say that. I knocked the weight off in the end, but it took a restrictive diet and some keto brain to get there. I remember at one point while I was driving down to BCs that I thought to myself, why am I doing this? I would spend countless hours searching #bcs2015 on instagram and check out my competition. I was terrified of who I was going to step on stage with simply because I knew I was natural, and many of the women I was up against were on a decent amount of gear. I felt the same way when I walked into the athlete's meeting; these girls were scary. To be honest, I should have expected that the girls would be as loaded as they were. In my defence, I had only been going to the gym for a couple of years and prior to that I was a little cardio bunny with noodle arms and no ass. I had to remind myself of how far I have come since I started going to the gym, and why I was stepping on stage competing against the best in BC. I wasn't going there to win. Taking a look back at how things were rolling in my life through my prep to the BC Championships, every day was a comparison. Every single time I looked at the mirror I thought, needs to be better. My waist isn't small enough; need to lose another 1/2" there. I can still see my cellulite. My arms look too big. Body dysmorphia. It's a real thing. I can't tell you how many people struggle with it either, and it's something that I'll admit to struggling with even today. It's certainly not as bad as what it was leading up to BCs. But I still have my moments. The biggest difference between my prep to BCs and my current prep (did I just drop the ball...), is that I honestly do not care about comparing my body to what it was in my last two shows. The fact that I have been able to stay this lean and still manage to find flexibility in my diet here and there is remarkable. I never would have thought it would be possible coming out of the most strict diet of my existence and not blowing up like a balloon. Then again, I'm not stupid with my diet. I eat very clean for the most part, but sometimes I'll admit that I go pretty hard on Menchies :). Am I doing anything different with my training? No Is my diet any different? Not really, I still eat fairly clean for the most part. I know my limits Am I happier? On so many levels yes, but I certainly have my days (give a girl a break) So... What is it then? I decided to join one of my best friends on her journey to the stage for the first time. That's why it's been easier. Every day we can rely on one another to get pumped about 45 minutes of fasted cardio, how excited we are to indulge in meal number 4, how sore our hamstrings are because leg day literally kicked our butts, how emotional we are because well we're girls, how much boys SUCK (we don't have time for that), how much fun we're going to have going hard on treats after the show, and sharing exciting new meal ideas. She has been the best companion throughout this process and I honestly can't thank her enough for all that she has done for me as a friend. At the end of the day, I am so freaking grateful.
On that note, why the heck didn't I 'release' to the world of social media that I had been on this hush-hush fitness journey? The thing behind doing bikini competitions is that there is so much reliance on social media for competitors to receive some form of recognition for their hard work. The other day I scrolled through my Instagram page and was pretty shocked at how many 'transformation' pictures I had up prepping for BCs. My mindset for that show was definitely not the healthiest. I used my Instagram page as a form of reassurance, which is so so so beyond wrong! I lacked a lot of confidence, clearly. That's why I kept this under wraps. I definitely told a few people I may have been training, usually only because they'd offer me a bite of cake and I accidentally slipped out the whole "sorry I can't, I might be training for a... shit". Whoops. Most of all, because this was such a split decision, I have loved the fact that I didn't stand on a mountain and shout it out to the world. This one is just for fun, it's for the benefit of having a good time during prep, for the benefit of one of my best friends, for support, and mostly to show that I am still in love with this sport. In love is a big term. Yeah, it might be. But how freaking cool is it to watch weight fall off of you and see your body change? And in off season, watch your booty go from 0-100 real quick? Oh baby get it in ya, it's real life. So while I lay in bed staring at the array of treats that await for Saturday night, I wish all of those competitors stepping on stage for the first, second, or 10th time tomorrow at the Knight of Champions the very best of luck. See you on stage. <3 Where is the love? We have reached a time in our lives where the process of falling in love and getting married is becoming more of a trend of the past rather than something that we grow old dreaming about. Sustainable love, in other words a committed relationship, is starting to become extinct. "I want someone, but I don't want to be attached, do you know what I mean?" What do you even call that? Why is there this whole negative stamina wrapped around the idea of being Facebook-official or 'in a relationship' status that people run away from, as if it is becoming the next plague? Welcome to 2015, people. The photo above was a picture I had taken in Cancun, Mexico a couple of years ago when I was the happiest I had ever been in my life (even though I had just tumbled in Coral hehe). At that time in my life, I never would have thought I would be in the same thought process that I am in today - why is it becoming more popular for people to deny commitment with any significant other, and yet it's totally okay for those in a committed relationship to be talking, flirtatiously, with other people too? The "I do what I want" attitude that people (guys AND girls) possess about relationships and / or being single, is one of the reasons why so many people who are ridin' solo are so miserable. "I just can't seem to find anyone that I like". Here's how this epidemic works: He's talking to her while getting on with her while hanging with her, meanwhile she's talking to this guy while she's got a no-strings-attached intimate friendship with this dude and dating so-and-so on the side. Is this really becoming an acceptable way to live life? Like what I'm trying to wrap my brain around, is can you really fall in love this way? Or is 95% of the population just in the wrong mindset about relationships? What is going to happen when you actually find someone that you like unexpectedly, and you have three other 'potentials' on the go and you have to tell them that you've started to see someone else exclusively... Will they all accept and move on? Some may fight back. One thing that many people come across, and I've been guilty of this just as much as others have, is wondering at the back of your mind what if with someone you had been with in the past. What if I gave them a second chance. Or third chance. Or eighth chance. What if we had the opportunity to start all over. Those are the people that our hearts have grown attached to and no matter how hard we try and move forward and seek that same love in others, our hearts will always wander back and make us think. As sad as it is, our heart is always right. That feeling in your gut? Trust it. Those butterflies? They're real. Yep, there are real butterflies that are legitimately making their way around your stomach with your protein shake you had this morning for breakfast.
Back on track. The thing is, the more that time flies, the more we grow externally, internally, and intellectually. The fact that we keep venturing back to a particular individual is because there is a piece of us that has grown on them that some of us may want back in order to move on and forget about it, while others may just want that other person back in their life. Accept it. I can't count how many times I've been asked by my relatives, "Richelle when are you going to get yourself a nice boy and get your life going? You're going to have the cuuuuuttteesssttttt little blonde babies and whoever you marry is going to be one lucky guy"... It's probably the same amount that I think please get off of my back I am going to live on my own with adopted children and a big dog, but at the same time I also think because I haven't met anyone else that makes me tick. If I do meet someone, they're the type that make it seem like they want a committed relationship, but before you know it you're running in the opposite direction because they're in love with being single. Be single then. But I am sure many people can agree, it's not worth investing your time and energy getting to know someone when you're fully aware that they have zero intent in making whatever it is that you have going on into something worthwhile in the long run; committed, sustainable love. No, people, you aren't going to be 'single' forever. You (we) are just caught in a gross trend that people think it's okay to have 3-5 people on the go at once. I think what is important to remember here is that in order for us to find Mr or Mrs Right, we must first love ourselves and not let anyone love us any less. Correct? Right. There's no right or wrong way to move forward with life so to speak. Some people never move on. But praise to those who wake up every damn day no matter how hard it is and push on with a smile; you're all champs. Food for thought, happy weekend. <3 Everyone has a different story. Why are you competing? Some say it's because they want to do something for themselves. Some say it's because, well, why not? Some even say they're doing it because they want to win. Whatever the reason may be, people decided that they want to put their bodies through a ton of work both mentally and physically to walk on stage with a glazey tan and 6% body fat. It's a lot of dedication. It's a lot of freaking work. Every prep is different, at least it has been for me. When I decided I wanted to compete, I had just gotten out of a serious relationship, had no confidence or self-worth, was pretty average at working out considering I had only been lifting for a year, and I knew how to walk in heels. That was it. I decided to do the show because I needed to get better at all of those things for one, but mostly gain a little self-esteem. I didn't decide to do it because I thought I had the right body for it, but because a couple little birdies put a bug in my ear that made me think I could achieve something if I really put the right amount of time and effort into it. I don't know what happened between that prep and my prep for BCs, because it was really different let me tell you that. I think my biggest mistake was going into it thinking that I needed to be leaner, needed to be this, needed to be that. My point is, I put too much stress on my body that it stopped responding, or others may refer it to hitting a plateau. It's like a bodybuilders worst nightmare, all of a sudden I ain't see in' no gains homie! So what changed? It has now been 8 weeks since BCs, and I have seen more positive changes to my physique than ever before, including maintaining my stage weight like, what?! In these 8 weeks I have the IDGAF attitude about dieting, instead adding more flexibility and not stressing about the fact that my granola to yogurt ratio this morning was like 3:1. That's the thing, no longer stressing in this 'off season' or 'on season' or whatever it may be, has made me fall in love with lifting all over again. Like can we get a load of how nice it is to have callouses all over your hands... Backtrack. What I am trying to get out here is that there are far too many competitors these days that are falling out of love with the process. And why?! Because they are putting too much pressure on themselves to be a certain way, when they should just trust that their bodies will just do their thing and provide the best results with better attitude. Love the process, for real. Since BCs ended I have had plenty of time to re-evaluate my training, goals, mindset and perspective of the fitness industry. I still wake up STOKED to lift, like today I flew out of bed knowing it was leg day for me and I got to go make some serious booty gains by throwing a bar on my back (no my ass didn't grow itself).
I still love it. Everything, the sweat, the pain, the hanger, everything. I also still plan to compete in the future (date - TBA), and fully intend on utilizing this contagious positive energy I'm getting off of people lately in my next prep whenever that may be. It's addicting. For those who follow my journey, you are all my inspiration. You all light up my life. You are the reason why I am still in love with the process. POSITIVE ATTITUDE = POSITIVE MINDSET = POSITIVE RESULTS. All my love. <3 Sometimes I wonder why people would pay money to go to McDonalds and get preservative-loaded garbage when they can take 10 minutes out of their day to prepare an unreal meal that won't leave your stomach feeling like you just ate a loaf of Wonder bread chased with Crisco. Gross right? And you wonder why fast food is so affordable. So some nights I like to play the 'awesome daughter' card and make my dad a mean meal that he will benefit from. Some of you may know, my dad has been battling cancer on and off for the last two years, so I have worked him into a lower-sugar diet with higher protein, simply because cancer likes to fest in high-sugar environments. We have been able to cut out all bread and sugary pops (aka Pepsi and Gatorade) and replaced it with water with lemons and a little club soda. Winning! When I was driving home from the beach the other day I thought, oh how good would a burger taste right now... and of course the wheels got turning. Earlier that day I pulled out a package of ground turkey thinking I'd use them for turkey meatloaf for meal prep, but I think this was a way better choice! "How do you feel about some bun-less burgs tonight, Dad?" Alright here's what you're going to need.
Ingredients: *A package of extra lean ground turkey *4 egg whites *1/3 cup gluten-free oats *1/4 tsp sea salt *1 large celery stock, finely chopped *1 shallot, finely chopped *1 tsp minced garlic *Lemon pepper Mrs. Dash or Epicure Sansel, your choice. Montreal steak spice would be pretty good too Mash all the ingredients in a bowl and form into patties. I made 4 patties with this recipe. These burgers are pretty soft so be careful when you put them on the barbecue. Grill over medium heat, making sure that the edges are cooked enough before you flip or they might fall apart. These are fragile little guys so you must be gentle, even though I know you're all hungry. Once the burgers were cooked, I set them over a bed of grilled asparagus (my favourite), which I just did with some coconut oil and sea salt in a grilling pan over the barbecue. 2-3 minutes is usually good, mushy greens aren't a good time. I topped the burgers with some avocado cilantro dress, and sliced tomatoes and avocado. The best part is that these burgers were just enough, and well balanced. I got the approval from my Dad (the pickiest when it comes to a decent burger), so I'm happy :) Let me know what you all think! These were great to end a hot summer day, and a fresh way to indulge in the typical burger. Happy Saturday lovelies. <3 Okay so recently I've had the opportunity to play around with my diet and figure out what works best for my body. Who knew that the answer would mean more carbs!! I am definitely not complaining. I'd like to start this post off by talking about my 'off' season so far. I know it has only been four weeks since BCs this year, but I have already had the opportunity to replenish my body for the better where I don't feel like garbage after every meal that I eat. It's all about that balance. At least that's what everyone says, right? It's 100% the truth though! If we don't wake up every morning with that positive, balanced mindset, it throws off your entire day and makes you question every action you take. Why not wake up with a positive attitude and live it? The beauty of this mindset is that it's totally contagious. The good kind of contagious, like smiling. Lately I have been loving this attitude that I have woken up with. No matter what comes my way and what may resonate from the past, I know that I am so freakin' lucky to live the life that I do, and to be surrounded by people that I love and care for the most. Things have been really good lately, and I am happy to share that I'm exceptionally happy. So what's the big deal today? I'm super excited to share this unreal thing that I've fallen in love with. Smoothie bowls. A bowl with a smoothie in it that you throw a bunch of cool things on top and eat it with a spoon. Yeah, eating it with a spoon. Might seem a little strange and some people already think I'm weird but they taste wonderful, keep you full for hours, and photograph really well. Yesterday I made my bowl with enough fuel to last me through a run and an afternoon full of deadlifts with my coach. Get a load of this... Mmm. Memories. The beauty of smoothie bowls is that you can literally make your favourite smoothie and add whatever you want on top of it to enhance your smoothie bowl experience.
For mine, I went to my go-to ingredients that I usually stick in my shakes. It's been a long time coming, but I'm finally at the point where I'm ready to talk about it. Holy buckets, hold your freakin' horses. She's talking about love, people. Vulnerability. What the heck does that mean... I don't even know if I know what it means fully, but from my understanding thus far, I think it means I'm supposed to open my heart. I have spent the last year hiding behind a big brick wall being afraid to let anyone in. What do I mean by let anyone in? I mean like, let some guy into my soul. The deep stuff. Know what I mean? I've got trust issues like you wouldn't believe. I hold a lot of stuff in, but I've got a big mind. Always thinking, always processing, but never emitting. When it comes to the 'R' word, or 'relationships' (oh good God), I have found that I have a tendency to run away. It's not that I'm the non-committal type, it's that I'm absolutely terrified of letting myself fall in love with anyone simply because I don't want to give my heart away to someone who doesn't deserve it. I've been in love once, in fact I was completely head over heels for him. I really thought we would wind up married one day, we spent every waking minute of the day talking to one another. There was no one in the world that I was more excited to see or talk to at the end of the day than him. He was the biggest and most consistent part of my life for a very long time, and shared more memories with one another than I've ever had with anyone else. He knows me too well. Well enough that quite frankly our breakup affected my entire family, in a way it was like a divorce. I won't go too deep into detail, but ultimately we grew into two very different individuals who wanted different things in life at the time, and it ended before I knew it. Just like that. In general when relationships end between two people, they tend to find love, or lust, in someone who is the complete opposite of what they had in their past relationship. I have met some pretty unreal guys since my 'big' relationship ended, but no matter what I couldn't get my past relationship out of my mind. I was always comparing, they weren't him. I was afraid of falling for someone else because I didn't think it could ever feel as real as it did before. I'm confident that the 'real' feeling is still a possibility, but patience for the right one is something I am still learning. This is also why girls tend to think that there are no 'good' guys in the world... No, there definitely are. But we are too busy running away from them and chasing the ones that are so wrong for us, that we forget about the ones that were so right for us in the first place. It's just a really sad little circle we tend to run around in, I think many of us are guilty for it. I learned my lesson. My mom gave me some great advice a few weeks ago when I was feeling a little bitter about the idea of any kind of relationship. Don't be afraid to fall again, it will happen when you least expect it and when you're least ready for it, but when it happens, you'll know it's right. Moms always know best, right? Patience. Reflecting on the last year of my life, there have been more changes than I can count on my hands. My entire life is completely different from what it was last year, like holy smokes! I have met so many people, experienced so many changes, seen things I never saw before, my eyes have completely opened up, and slowly along with that, so has my heart. At this point in my life, I am not looking for love or wanting a relationship like many people are. Rather, I am taking this opportunity of being on my own to utilize my imagination and accomplish goals in order to build my future.
"Don't you feel alone, though?" Duh. Sometimes it can get real lonely, don't get me wrong. I love that photo that has been circulating instagram lately that says "I can be the most independent girl 99% of the day, but the other 1% I just want to be little spoon". This could not be more true. The problem is that most guys don't understand independent women like I don't go to bed dreaming of being a housewife, thank you so much though! Right now, as selfish as it sounds, I just love the fact that I can do whatever I want with my life and not feel like I have to be watching my back because bae is keeping tabs of my life. No thank you. That said however, I am keeping a completely open mind, and a vulnerable heart, to whatever life throws at me. Like I said, I'm certainly not anti-relationship, I fully encourage it. I just want to make sure that for me, the next one that I do 'enter' is one that will prove to be beneficial for both parties, and that the relationship itself is a two-way street. What benefits them will benefit me, and vice-versa. I am confident that there is some kind of 'relationship' out there for everyone, and to keep your heart open. Just make sure that whatever 'relationship' you find yourself in, that it is equally beneficial for the both of you, but most of all keep your love close to your heart. There are some real winners out there. <3 |
AuthorProviding you with the knowledge that I encounter on a daily basis through my fitness lifestyle. Archives
January 2018
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